Last postseason, Eli Manning famously made it through the entire postseason–which he played entirely on the road–while only throwing one interception. This, of course, discounts the botched pick by Asante Samuel that would have given the Patriots the Super Bowl victory, but it was nonetheless an impressive feat for someone who, up until that point, was known solely for his postseason failures. Then, with the Giants emerging early in this season as a potential perennial powerhouse, the talk of Eli being a bust as a quarterback all but dissapeared. He was, afterall, reigning Super Bowl MVP, who could question that?

It became painfully obvious, though, this past Sunday that Eli has barely improved over the course of his four years in the league. He throws the ball behind receivers’ backs, over their heads, at their shoe tips, and a lot of the time, directly into the other teams’ hands. He is a successful NFL quarterback who has never really thrown the ball at his receivers. He just throws it in their general direction, yet he is a Super Bowl champion.

Which is why he owes his career to Plaxico Burress. Burress, of course, shot himself in the leg on November 28th of this year while at a nightclub in New York City, but he effectively shot Eli in the arm that same night, as well. Look at Manning’s stats for December compared to the rest of his season. His rating dropped from the mid-90s down below 70. He was sacked more, he had a worse completion percentage, and less yards per catch.

Watch a Burress highlight reel and you begin to realize what a weapon he really was. Manning could throw a five yard dump pass which Burress could turn into a 50 yard touchdown. Then you’ll see him skying over two defenders for a jump ball, diving for a throw that would normally be unreachable, or reaching behind his back to make a one-handed catch. It’s a great highlight reel, but what the video doesn’t mention is that these were his normal catches.  He made those extraordinary catches look routine, turning Eli’s wobbly pop ups into stats that transformed Manning into a Pro Bowler on paper.

But as Manning struggled to make even the simplest of throws on Sunday against a mediocre Eagles defense, it became painfully obvious that if Eli plans on having a job past next year, it would be in his best interest to forgo his off seasons vacations and spend his money of defense lawyers and gun safety lessons for the only receiver that ever made him look like an adaquate NFL quaterback.  The reason the rest of the Giants said they would welcome the potential felon back with open arms is simple: they cannot and will not win without him.

What a fucking drama queen. Can I see highlights of some actual games please??

@ GREEN BAY W 26-0
VS. DETROIT W 34-7
@ MINNESOTA W 19-16
VS. SEATTLE W 37-6
VS. BUFFALO W 40-7
@ ARIZONA CARDINALS 10/29
VS. SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS 11/5
VS. MIAMI DOLPHINS 11/12
@ NEW YORK GIANTS 11/19
@ NEW YORK JETS 11/26
@ NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS 12/3
VS. MINNESOTA VIKINGS 12/11
@ ST. LOUIS RAMS 12/17
VS. TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS 12/24
@ DETROIT LIONS 12/31
VS. GREEN BAY PACKERS

Nobody. This is a 16-0 schedule, right here. Eight division games in the weakest division in the league. Their toughest games are at the Giants (which says something in itself, when the Giants are one of your hardest games), who have a defense and an offense that maybe, might, temporary be able to keep up the Bears overall juggernaut, and then at Foxboro, where Belichick awaits.

Still, they are #1 in points scored and points allowed. How are teams supposed to score on a defense that barely lets up a touchdown a game and outscore highest scoring offense in the league? Their team is set up perfectly for the stretch run. They had the best defense in the league last year, and then went out and spent their whole draft on defense. Anyone gets hurt, they just plug someone else right in to the machine. That’s on top of Rex Grossman now throwing 35 yard frozen ropes better than anyone this side of Peyton Manning. Granted stranger things have happened, but if this team is anything but 16-0 or maaaaybe 15-1, I’ll be shocked.